Happy April 25th, friends! I’m sure this is just a regular Tuesday afternoon for most of you, but for me and my hubby, this is the BEST day. It is our anniversary-our second anniversary. We have loved marriage and all that comes with it-the companionship, the many opportunities to grow, the adventures, learning how to love more deeply each day-it really is an amazing blessing in our lives. As I’m thinking through these last two years, remembering our wedding day, the day that really was a glimpse of heaven, I can’t help but think on what we have learned so far. We are learning everyday and I really don’t believe that we ever “arrive” at this marriage thing (or life for that matter) but it is fun to see how far we’ve come. So, in honor of our anniversary, Collier and I created lists (individually) of the three biggest things we have learned about each other and in general over these last two sweet years through being married…
3 biggest things he’s learned since being married:
- If I only love Marissa when I feel like it, I won’t fully understand the purpose in marriage. What I mean by that is basically – love isn’t a feeling it’s a choice – and an action. Yes, great feelings of joy and excitement come with being in love and being married but it all comes back to a choice and choosing to love her and stay in love even when it’s not all butterflies and rainbows.
- The only thing that will sustain me and my marriage is faith (in Jesus).
- Dating can’t stop after you get married-it is just the start.
3 biggest things he’s learned about Marissa since being married:
- She may have left Chicago, but Chicago didn’t leave her (and yes I am referring to her driving).
- Marissa never settles and doesn’t have time for mediocrity (whether with her faith, her business or her ice cream, she desires the most out of everything), and she always knows how to make me laugh, especially when I get moody.
- She is a HUGE UNC fan. I mean I thought I was intense, but you should’ve seen her on National Championship night.
3 biggest things she’s learned since being married:
1. Intimacy and vulnerability is a choice. I get to decide whether I give Collier the tender real parts of my heart or the hardened protected ones, afraid of vulnerability. It’s always worth it to choose warm fuzzies over cold pricklies. He deserves those parts of me.
2. Laughter is the best medicine. Sometimes you just need to take a step back, get things in perspective, and laugh together. We don’t need to take everything SO seriously, it’s just life, and 90% of the time the things we worry about work themselves out.
3. The recipe for a joyful, full, fun marriage is: a close relationship with Jesus + a desire to grow. When you put those two things together, in two people who are together, their relationship becomes bulletproof. If I spend less time worrying about “fixing” Coll’s issues, and put that focus on how I can grow, issues work out. They work out because Coll trusts that I am intentionally pursuing Jesus and growth and I trust that Coll is intentionally pursuing Jesus and growth. We can’t change each other. Only God brings heart change.
3 biggest things she’s learned about Collier since being married:
1. He loves having a clean kitchen almost as much as he loves me.
2. He is the most humble and gentle man I know-always quick to listen and slow to speak (I have a lot to learn from him).
3. His love for UNC and America runs so much deeper than I anticipated. I’m learning to match his energy but it may take a lifetime.
We love marriage SO much. And we believe in building strong marriages. We’re grateful for the last two years together and we’re looking forward to what the next hundred hold for us.
**all photo credit from our wedding day goes to the amazing A Little Long Distance: http://www.alittlelongdistance.com/